Draft: to be reviewed by a lawyer before publishing.

How matching works

Version: 2026-10-22

Acquainted aims to arrange at least one meet a week for every member, and makes it good when it can't (part 5). In your plans you tell us when you're usually free, who to meet, which areas you can get to, the range you'd spend and what you'd like to do; within those, the system picks the person (or, if you'd rather meet in a group, the people in your group), the time and the place, and sends it to all of you. Everyone says yes or no by the decision time; if it's on, you meet. Pairing uses only what you told us in Acquainted, nothing from elsewhere, and nobody can pay to be paired first.

1. When meets are arranged

The system keeps looking at every meet time two to three days ahead. While a city is small it has only a few times a week, so people's times meet: coffee after work on weekdays (17:30), coffee on weekend afternoons (15:00) and dinner every day (19:30); more open as it grows (elsewhere, seven a day, from 8:30 in the morning to 9 at night). You're considered for a time when:

your profile is set up, your pass is valid, and one of your plans has that time and says who you'd like to meet;
you're free then (from your plans, or a time you changed just once), and not taking time off;
it isn't a time you already said no to or didn't answer by its decision time;
you have no other meet that day;
you haven't reached the number of meets a week you chose (one by default, at most three).

Your plans are used only to decide when, where and with whom you meet, and who can get to the same place.

2. Who can be paired (rules)

Two people must both:

want to meet the other's gender (each by the plan for that time);
both have, or both not have, "Only LGBTQ+ people";
have a kind of meet in common (from what each plan is for);
share at least one language;
share at least one area they can get to (no areas picked means anywhere);
not have blocked each other, nor been arranged to meet before;
want at least one of the same things (from why you're here and, for dating, long-term or short-term);
for a date, fit any height, faith or politics wish the other made a must, not want different relationship styles (exclusive or open; not asked in mainland China or Taiwan), fit each other's wishes about relationship status, not have a firm no that's the other's kink for something short-term, and, when either said it must match, not disagree about wanting children (two people who don't can still meet as friends, if both want to);
be within the age range the other asked for, or, when neither set one, no more than 15 years apart.

3. How well they fit

Within the rules, each pair gets a fit from 0 to 100, from how alike they are in:

the parts of life their topics and "about you" answers are about;
what they're here for;
everyday habits (hours, smoking, drinking, pets), and whether someone would rather not meet a smoker;
for something long-term: children and when, settling down, staying in the city, family;
for something short-term: what it means, the kind of first meet and, in London, Paris and New York, the pace of physical closeness and shared kinks (these are used only here, and never shown);
personality and getting along, values and outlook, how you spend and pay, and, for a date, height, faith and politics wishes that aren't a must;
the range each would spend;
both wanting to meet more LGBTQ+ people;
how deep they like to go;
age;
shared languages.

Everything in "Get to know you" is optional. Anything you haven't said counts as neutral: never for you, never against you.

Groups. People who'd rather meet in a group are only put with each other, three to seven in a group, never one-on-one; it's on when at least three say yes. Everyone in a group shares a language and an area they can get to (or one the musts allow, see below), nobody there has blocked anybody, and their ages fit each other's ranges. Gender and goals don't decide who is in a group together.

Wishes, and musts. Your age range, your areas and your spend are wishes. When someone is left without a meet at a time, a second round may loosen the wishes they didn't make a must: an age up to 5 years outside the range (or, without ranges, up to 5 years past the usual gap), a place in someone else's area, a place outside the spend range. Each loosened wish counts against the fit, so the closest fits still come first, and the proposal tells you which of yours was loosened (nobody else is told). Gender, a shared language, blocks and history are never loosened, and nor is anything you made a must.

4. Everyone free at one time, together

At each time, everyone who can meet then is put together at once: first pairs among those who'd meet one-on-one (as many as possible, then the highest total fit), then groups among those who'd rather meet in a group; each first as everyone asked, then loosening wishes for whoever is left. Anyone who hasn't had a meet yet that week gets a head start. The same situation always gives the same result.

Then the system finds a place with room in an area everyone can get to (or, with a loosened area, one everyone who made areas a must can get to), within everyone's spend range (above the highest floor anyone chose and within the lowest limit; a walk costs nothing, so it always fits). The kind of meet is one everyone's plan is for, as the time allows: where a city has few times, each time is one kind (coffee or dinner); elsewhere, brunch on weekend mornings and middays, walks in the afternoon and early evening, coffee any time.

5. Deciding

While Acquainted is small, someone on our team may look over a match before it's sent to you, or arrange one by hand, by the same rules as above. Either way you get it the same way, with at least 6 hours to answer.
You all get the proposal at the same time: who, what kind, the day and part of it, and the area. Everyone says yes or no within 24 hours (and no later than 24 hours before), and can change their mind until then. Nobody sees what anybody else chose.
At the decision time it's decided for everyone at once: on if a pair both said yes, or if at least three in a group did. Then those coming get the place, the table, and each their own word to say; in a group, they see who else is coming. After that there's no backing out.
If it's off, those who said yes learn only that it didn't come together, never who said no or why; whoever didn't answer learns they missed it. Either way the system goes on looking for a meet for each of you, never with the same people at that time again; whoever said no or didn't answer isn't offered that time again.
If a week ends without a meet for you (one that was on, that you were at, and that someone else checked in to), although one of your plans had a time open in it and you held a pass from two days before that time to the end of the week, and not by your own doing (you didn't say no, leave a proposal unanswered past its decision time, call one off by blocking someone or deleting your account, or miss one you'd said yes to; days you took off don't count), you choose money back for that week or 7 more days on your pass.
For any other week you can ask us for 7 more days (Settings → Help and feedback); our team decides.

6. What we keep

A record of every meet arranged: with whom, when, where, who said yes or no, check-ins and code-word checks, each person's rating of it, which wishes were loosened, your fit and what you share. We use it to run the service, never arrange the same two people twice, keep the weekly promise, and handle reports.
Our staff can see these records, including who said yes or no. Other members can't.
Your plans and what you said in "Get to know you" are kept until you change them or delete your account. When you delete it they go; the meet records stay without your profile, so the other person's history still adds up. Sensitive items also go when you withdraw consent, and what your new city doesn't ask goes when you change city.

7. What you can do

Turn off personalised matching: Settings → Personalised matching. You're then paired by the rules in part 2 only, with no fit score: your topics, "About me" and what only counts towards fit (habits, the long-term and short-term questions, intimacy included) aren't used.
Change what you've said at any time: your plans, meets a week, "Get to know you" and "About me".
Can't make it? Say so on the proposal before its decision time and we'll find another time.
Make a wish a must: your age range in "Get to know you" (if you're open to dating, also a height range, and their faith or politics), your areas and spend range in each plan. Spend is a range: one band, or several next to each other, and if you'd rather spend more you can start from a higher band; a new plan has no spend chosen for you, and nothing is arranged from it until you choose one.
Tell us if a meet felt like a poor match: [email protected].

On a proposal, you both see the parts of life you share, as somewhere to start.